:        :::.                  :   ____,   
    In Memory,       :        :: :                  :  |_  _; Karl Marx
         ,~~         :        :::'istorted          :   `||     says:
      --)(           :    :::.          ::::        :    ||  "Aufheben!"
        ()=          :    :: :igital    ::. rection :    []
          HOOKAH!    :    :::'          ::::        :                       
                     :                              :
     27 April 1994   :       Text File #30          Mongoloid Telecom
   :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
                                          
****************************************************************************
Yes, folks! Yet another chance to marvel at TCC's on-going saga of BBS
blunderings!
****************************************************************************

Date: Tuesday, April 5, 1994  5:25pm                                 /Hello
From: Chaos                                                    Msg#: 170435
  To: ** ALL **                                                            
  Re: Free TCC BASEBALL HATS at this years PICNIC!                         

(N)ext, (P)revious, follow (T)hread, or (R)ead this message? 

                   * * * * *  HAVE JUST ARRIVED!  * * * * *

   That is right! This year, we will be offering the first " 90 " users
   who register for our Raffle a FREE BALLCAP!

   We just purchased 100 " TCC CUSTOMIZED BASEBALL CAPS ", with our
   logo on the front in white lettering on a black cap.

   All of our FIRST 90 USERS to register at our PICNIC on May 29th,
   will get one of the GREAT LOOKING TCC CAPS for FREE, along with
   of course, your chance to win one of our MANY prizes to be given
   away all day long! Last year the PRIZES included Walkmans, Modems,
   T-shirts, Movie passes, and computer accessories. This year there
   will be even MORE!

   SPECIAL EVENT THIS YEAR!
   ------- ----- ---- -----

*  The " TCC GIRL CONTEST "  *

   This is NO JOKE! We have custom designed 7 SPECIAL BALL CAPS to be
   awarded to SEVEN TCC WOMEN, voted by OUR OWN TCC USERS!

   SO! Any "FEMALES" on our Bbs who wish to sign up for our TCC GIRL
   contest should wait till we complete our VOTING BOOTH, at which time we
   will allow ALL users to vote for who they feel should be hailed
   "TCC GIRL".

   This "pagent" will be quite an event! All females are ENCOURAGED to
   register for this prestigous title of "TCC GIRL". Seven LUCKY
   contestants will be selected by YOU, the USERS of TCC! :)


*****************************************************************************

Wow! What an honor to be chosen as an OFFICIAL **T*C*C** **G*I*R*L**!!! Yes!
Seven, that's right seven (7) lucky females will be chosen! Hmmm... but then
I noticed something on TCC's main menu....

*************************************************************************

A  Account Info/Edit      I  System Information    R  Registry of Users
B  Birthday Information   K  Global Chat Info      S  Sysop Menu
C  Global Commands Menu   L  File Libraries        T  Teleconference
D  Download System Docs   M  Messaging Menu       *W* TCC Weather Service
E  Downloads over 1 hour  O  Global Option Menu    X  Logoff (exit system)
G  Games and Doors        P  Personals (dating)    Z  BBS-Online (dial out)
H  Online System Help     Q  Pizza parlor          *  Adult Menu
/GO STUFF  Misc. Commands U  Hall of Fame Bbs       /GO RULES  System Rules
Accounts:657  Male:555  Female:10  Calls:115654 Time:02:45   Date:17-APR-94

***************************************************************************

Now, note the total number of females on the entire BBS. Ten (10)!! That
means that only three will lose. Boy, if I was one of those three, I would
feel pretty shitty. And, if I was one of the seven LUCKY winners, I really
wouldn't feel that special. Also note the above numbers.... Now our species
(humans) comes in either a male gender, or a female gender. So, if you add
the total females, to the total males, you should get the total number of
people/accounts on the entire system. But, when you figure it out, you come
up with 92 accounts that aren't male or female! Is this the number of
accounts Larry has on hold?!? Hmmmm....

Another TCC capture by the Duuk Tsarith.
***************************************************************************

                                   
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                      Distorted Digital Erection     
An AUFHEBEN Production!   Support Boards:     Tyrant:         Number:
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    CHECK for MORE Distorted Digital Erection in the NEAR future!
      Want to be a support board for DDE? Download ALL the DDE's,
   create a file sig on your board, and let me know. Your BBS will
     be listed. TO CONTACT US: Send e-mail to Amphetamine Gobbler
       on Radio KAOS, or send Internet mail to aufheben@aol.com
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-eof-